My Testimony:

 

 

The very first time that I can remember ever having any hope in my life was the year that I turned twenty-nine. Up until that time I never knew that there was such a thing as hope in this world.

 

I was born and raised in a very small community in central New Brunswick, Canada. The year was 1948 and I was the second son in a row for my parents who would go on to have eleven children altogether. When you hear of folks being poor and country that is exactly what we were.

 

My father never had any faith that I was ever aware of but it seemed my mother had enough for us all. I can remember her leading us off to Sunday school but when we got older I guess we just went our own way. As an early teenager I would rather sit by the radio and listen to the hit parade than go to church. I guess I decided at that time that Gods way was not my way.

 

I was probably the most introverted young man that you could ever meet. I never had any real close friends and if anyone even looked at me the wrong way I would tell them in a very fiery language where to go.

 

I was okay with school up until I started junior high then I slowly began to hate it with a passion. First of all I was a very shy person, second, I had no friends and third, my brother who was one year ahead of me never gave me the time of day. I guess he had his own friends and maybe he never gave me a second thought. Maybe the fact that we fought like cats and dogs had something to do with it.

 

Anyway, at the age of sixteen I decided to quit school. I had a couple of jobs but there was really nothing that I was interested in. It seems to me now that I just wanted to get away from everything and everybody. When springtime came I got my chance.

 

One of my favorite uncles was visiting from Ontario and when the time came for him to return I asked if I could go with him and he said yes. I didn’t know it at the time but I was doing exactly what God intended for me to do, but it would be a few years down the road before I ever thought that He even existed.

 

My uncle lived in a small apartment in the West End of Toronto and if I remember correctly it was only a two bedroom. The first thing I remember about Toronto was how extremely hot it was. I actually thought it was unbearable, I don’t even think we had humidity back home let alone weather this hot.  Anyway I had to go out everyday and look for a job. This was probably my first real experience with frustration.

 

I do not know exactly when it started but it seems to me now that I’ve always had the spirit of rage and anger. When I would get angry I would literally see red. There have been a number of times in my life when I could have easily killed someone. I guess the Lord was looking out for me even then.

 

This was the summer of 1964 and like I said to me it was the hottest summer on record. But I kept looking for a job and finally I landed one. It was working in a car wash for one dollar an hour and ten hours a day but it was my first job and I was excited. Then just like every teenage boy I began to desire my own car. I believe it took about a year but I finally bought one. It wasn’t much but it was mine and so I began cruising for chicks.

 

It was about that time that I was introduced to a guy by the name of Ray. I have no idea why we became buddies but we did. Maybe it’s because we had one thing in common and that was chicks. For the next couple of years we did nothing else but run the roads looking for chicks. I apologize for that word but that was our exact mindset at the time.

 

Now comes the time in my life when I’m positive that the Lord was looking after me. If it hadn’t been for the next incident in my life I have no idea where I may have ended up.

 

It was the summer of 1966 and we were out cruising as usual when for some unknown reason we decided to go to a local Friday night dance. When we walked in the door we both saw her for the very first time. She was the most beautiful creature that I had ever laid eyes on. It was literally love at first sight for me. But what happened? She decided to date my best friend instead.

 

Here I was eighteen years old, madly in love and she was dating my best friend. I had a problem. Then come to find out there were at least five other guys who were madly in love with her too. Not that she was promiscuous by any means but simply a gorgeous chick having fun.

 

Well I spent the next few months chasing these other guys off and it was no easy chore but I was determined that she was mine. Once she realized how serious I was then she began to notice me too. To make a long story short we were married in April of 1968.

 

We had a wonderful marriage for the first few years. Our son Mike was born in 1970 and he was the greatest child that any parent could ask for. We were one happy family but like everything else in life if we allow ourselves to follow after temptation then the problems begin.

 

I had always dreamed of being a country music entertainer. I had another uncle who played in a country band and that is exactly what I desired to do.

I had always written poems and songs from as far back as I can remember and my greatest desire was to be a songwriter. I did everything I could think of to be successful in the music business. I joined a country band, I practiced every second that I could but nothing ever worked out for me. This was the beginning of total frustration for many years to come.

 

The enemy knows our weaknesses because he’s the one who tempted us in the first place. I began to give into anger and rage more and more. I began to curse God and everybody else on a daily basis. I hated the fact that nothing ever worked out for me.

 

By the time 1977 rolled around I was a very miserable person. On January the eighteenth of that year I would be 29 years old. Little did I know that this would be the turn around year of my life.

 

My wife has always enjoyed looking after other people’s children besides her own. At the beginning of 1977 we were living in a ground floor apartment while on the third floor lived her best friend Judy. Well Judy had the sweetest little five year old girl that we had ever seen besides our own of course. Her name was Tammy.

 

When my birthday came around my wife had a little party and of course Tammy was there with our children. At some point during the evening I was sitting at the table and she came over to me and said I have a present for you. I opened it and saw that she had wrapped up three or four dimes of her own money and gave them to me as a gift. Well of course I gave her a big hug and kiss and a big thank you too. Little knowing at that moment that this would be the last hug I’d ever give her in this life.

 

Just a few days later when I came back to the yard where I parked my truck there was a message waiting for me to call my sister in law at home. This was very unusual to get a call like this so I knew that something was wrong. When she picked up the phone I knew right away that it was bad news. She said Ron, little Tammy was involved in an accident on her way home from school today and she didn’t make it.

 

There is no way in the world to describe this kind of tragedy to anyone who hasn’t experienced it personally. To my dear wife it was like losing one of her own. I really thought that she wasn’t going to make it through this awful time in our lives. But she did. I guess it’s true that time does heal to a certain degree.

 

This tragedy effected me in a different kind of way and it’s very hard to explain exactly what I felt at the time. Of course I was upset and I cried but mostly I was angry. This experience brought back some memories from my past that I had almost forgotten. When I was around the age of eight or so my two-year-old brother was killed in a train accident. I only remember a couple of things about that day but my biggest question has always been why? When Tammy died that question began to haunt me almost everyday.

 

At the time I wouldn’t have known God if He came down the road in a Hummer with God painted on the side. I had never even thought about whether God even existed or not since I was a young teen. Now I was upset and I wanted to know the truth. This was all that He needed to draw me in.

 

Talking about hope, I had no idea that we could have hope in anything or anyone. God knew this and so He began to put in motion the steps that would draw me into His Kingdom. I began to read some books about God and astrology and other topics that sounded like they might have some answers. Actually I began to read almost anything I could get my hands on. The strange thing is I was never a reader.

 

In July of that year we traveled back to New Brunswick for a two-week vacation. We had heard that my brother in law had become a Christian just a short time ago and I was anxious to find out what it was all about. On the Saturday that we arrived at his house he came right out and invited us to church the next day.

 

Well yours truly was not interested in going to church so everybody else went but me. While they were gone I began to look through some books that he had on a shelf. This was the moment that God was waiting for. The Bible says when you search for me with all your heart you will find me. Well I was searching and He was available. I began to look through the books when I came upon one of the most successful Christian books of all time, it was titled “The Late Great Planet Earth”. When I read that title I knew I just had to read it. For the first time in my life I actually enjoyed reading a book all the way through. I was amazed at what I read; I had never imagined anything like this in all the world. God had actually caused people to write prophecies concerning the future and then caused them to come true. It was amazing.

 

When we arrived back home I ran out to the nearest bookstore and bought my own copy of “ The Late Great Planet Earth “. Up to this time in my life I had never owned a Bible. I had no idea that you could own your own Bible. I couldn’t remember seeing people with their Bibles in church but I did have the faint memory of my grandfather reading his New Testament

 

Anyway, I was watching a Christian television program one day and the man offered me a free Bible so I took him up on his offer. The first thing that I did when I received it was to look up every prophecy that was used in the “Late Great Planet Earth” to make sure that it was so.

 

I slowly began to get excited on the inside and the hope that I never knew was just a few days away.

 

By this time it was early fall and I began to watch a full gospel Christian Television program.  The reason I was interested in this show was because it had a talk show format similar to Johnny Carson. The more I watched this show the more hope began to rise up on the inside of me. Then one night just like the Bible says, faith is the substance of things hoped for the evidence of things not seen, the hope in my heart turned to faith and I finally saw what I had to do. The very next time that the invitation was given to accept Christ I knelt down by the coffee table and prayed sincerely for the first time in my life. At that moment a light came on in my heart and I knew that I was saved.

 

Today  I am a very contented man. After 41 years together, I still have my gorgeous wife, three children and nine precious grand children. I can truly say from the bottom of my heart, thank you Lord for the glorious hope in Your resurrection.

 

By: R W Nagle.